I like the topic of your thesis and I am looking forward to reading it. However i think you may have missed a few points. one thing to make it better would be to make your arguments more clear. another thing to help set the reader up for the rest of the paper is to add a few words on significance at the end.
your first argument is strong and i think it is closely related to your third argument, on is on the past and how its happened and the other is on the possible future. since they are related in that sense you might want to put them closer together.
all in all this looks like a pretty good outline, just find some more evidence and it should be a great paper
evan
hey Brittani
for one your topic seems like interesting. I think it will cover a lot. if it were me i would try and narrow down your thesis a little. You say that digitalization is affecting society in a major way, what exactly about the addiction is affecting people, in other words quickly summarize the rest of the paper. another thing you may want to add is how it is affecting people. This can be as broad as its good or its bad.
your first argument seems like something that is interesting and I think it is a good place to express what you think. in the section, Video Games of everything bad is good for you may be a good place to find some quotes and evidence on why people play games and are so obsessed when much of the activity and game includes
work.
for your second argument a good place for evidence might be some of the things said in class, i think we spent a few days talking about this.
your third argument is also interesting, today in class actually we mentioned how we as a people are much more likely to go on facebook that nytimes.com.
all in all i think your arguments are interesting and i can;t wait to read your paper.
evan
for one your topic seems like interesting. I think it will cover a lot. if it were me i would try and narrow down your thesis a little. You say that digitalization is affecting society in a major way, what exactly about the addiction is affecting people, in other words quickly summarize the rest of the paper. another thing you may want to add is how it is affecting people. This can be as broad as its good or its bad.
your first argument seems like something that is interesting and I think it is a good place to express what you think. in the section, Video Games of everything bad is good for you may be a good place to find some quotes and evidence on why people play games and are so obsessed when much of the activity and game includes
work.
for your second argument a good place for evidence might be some of the things said in class, i think we spent a few days talking about this.
your third argument is also interesting, today in class actually we mentioned how we as a people are much more likely to go on facebook that nytimes.com.
all in all i think your arguments are interesting and i can;t wait to read your paper.
evan
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